Don't Breathe (2016)

Blind but far from helpless in Don't Breathe

It's hard to attack a movie like Don't Breathe. It's a big screen, R rated horror movie that's doing gang buster business at the box office. OK maybe not so hard as I have seen reviews attacking it. Negative reviews based on the sexual abuse sub-plot and it lack of scares and tension. I went in hoping to be able to defend it against the anti- rape sentiment that is cascading through the horror community. I guess I should state at this point that I am not, in any way, pro-rape. However I also feel a horror movie should be about horror, and if a rape scene is necessary for the story, it should happen. Like all things care should be taken that it's not gratuitous and unnecessary.

So I went in to Don't Breathe hopeful. Riding high on some positive reviews of people I trusted. Reviews that the film was a taut, suspenseful ride, if not really scary. The basic plot was interesting, and held some promise. A group of kids break into a house attempting to rob it, only to find themselves trapped inside. Trapped and hunted by a blind man with murderous intent. It was a great set up actually. Turning the tables on movies with a blind victim stalked by home invaders such as the classic Wait Until Dark. 

Don't Breathe movie poster

However, as is often the case, reality is far removed from promise. Sadly it was a great set up mostly wasted, and I have a hard time defending it, or defending the inclusion of the rape scene. I wont attack it to hard, because there was a couple good points to the film. They were minor points, and while I have a hard time saying I enjoyed Don't Breathe, I don’t hate it. It just wasn't anything special, which is a shame for a movie doing so well.

So on to those good points. Stephen Lang was a good point. I thought he was great as the blind antagonist. I just think the character wasn't well written or thought out. He had potential and Lang did what he could to bring it out. But whereas he could have been a strong malevolent force, or alternatively a sympathetic character gone bad, it seemed the writers couldn't decide and tried to split the difference. There was also such variance in his abilities. He can bounce all around his house, reacting or over reacting to the slightest sound. At other times he can't hear footfalls, or his potential victims talking. Even his lack of eye sight seems to vary. Is he blind? It appears so at times. Other times he seems to have some blurry vision. I still say Lang gave it his best but he couldn't salvage the character. So instead of a imposing Zatoichi, we get a limp ass Daredevil.

The other thing that impressed me, with no reservations was the setting. Don't Breathe showed Detroit in it's festering decay. It avoided the easy route of showing deteriorating urban vistas and grand violence. Instead it showed us what appeared to be sub urban homes fallen into decay. It shocked me to think an American city could look like this. Homes, that might once have been nice, even expensive homes being reclaimed by nature. It looks like we are witnessing what will one day become ancient ruins right in front of our eyes. From friends who live in Michigan, Don't Breathe presented a realistic picture of Detroit. My last point is spoilerish so I'll leave till the end.

On to the bad. It's true what they said. The people who hated it. Don't Breathe just isn't scary. However it isn't true that it's a suspenseful ride. It just never put me on edge. Never made me feel claustrophobic. There are so many films that got this right. The Descent, the end scenes of Silence of the Lambs, even the low budget Crawl or Die. The scenes of the protagonists fleeing in the trapped house were just to few and far between. More time should have been spent hiding, slowly creeping, trying not to make a sound.

And there was just too much sound. Ambient sound from the score, people talking, it was just too much. This film should have taken a clue from The Witch and had long moments of absolute silence. Then every sound would have been amplified, and shocking. Watch the end of the wonderful Tombs of the Blind Dead. Listen as the woman hides from the blind dead, being completely silent until we hear the sound of her heart, beating louder and louder as the dead moved toward her. That was fucking tension. That was fucking horror.

Now the rape scene, and ***Spoiler alert***there was no actual rape. A sexual assault/rape was planned but did not happen. There was a rape perpetuated but it was off screen, before the events of the film. Now I feel, personal opinion, that a rape can be used in a horror film, just as much as a murder, decapitation, disembowelment or immolation. Yes, it's a bad thing, but bad people in horror movies do bad things. In Don't Breathe though, the scene just interrupts from what we want to see, from what we paid to see, which is a bad ass blind man hunting down people who invaded his home.

What was this sub plot meant to do anyway? Was it to make him more of a monster? Or to attempt some amount of sympathy for him? It did neither. All the subplot managed to do was make our already barely likeable protagonists even less likeable. Why not leave the sub plot off. Allow the antagonist to be a more sympathetic character. A victim of a home invasion by morally ambiguous characters. Just a sad, man who snaps and goes nuclear on a group of kids. Or just make him a horrible, irredeemable character. It tried to hold the middle ground and it lost it all. Even the line “I'm not a rapist”, is that supposed to illicit sympathy? Make him look not quite so bad? It fucking failed miserably. If anything it made him look like a sick fuck and a pussy. Freddy Kruger never tries to justify what he does.

The protagonists themselves are not easily likeable. That's OK with me. I don’t have to like characters to feel or them, or to enjoy them as leads in a movie. I can even dig a movie with a sympathetic villain and unlikeable heroes if it's done right. The problem here is the characters are so typical. You know almost from the beginning who is going to live and die. Honestly if you have ever seen a handful of horror movies you should know exactly in what order they will bite it. If you have seen Don't Breathe, raise your hand if you called it. There's money the tough guy, packing heat gangsta wanna be (G-Money!!! Holla) who wants to escape Detroit, his girlfriend Rocky, who's in an abusive family and wants to escape with her younger sister, and Alex, the nerd who goes along on the robberies because of his hopeless crush on Rocky. OK even if you haven't seen Don't Breathe, raise your hand if you called it. BTW cheap ass low blow opening the film with a scene late in the movie to try and trick your audience Fede.

Still even with unlikeable characters this could have been a hit. Scrap the hostage/rape subplot and dedicate the majority of the running time to the characters running and fighting for their lives. Turn up that claustrophobia by using narrow hallways and basements, limited lighting and very sparse sounds. Scare the shit out of your audience every time you hear a foot scrape on the floor. Imagine ten minutes of silence, broke by a sudden small sound amplified out the ass. It's horror, be fucking scary.

The last thing I will say is I liked the final scene. OK I liked parts of the final scene and I have to spoil it so, look away Martha!!!! ***Spoiler alert***

At the end when we find out the bad blind guy isn’t dead (can you spell “sequel” kiddos?), Rocky makes the decision to get on the train and go on to her new life. Totally morally bad, no heroic ending that worked for me. To many times the average Joe, instead of making good on his escape goes back to be a hero. I just rarely find that believable. Rocky knows by keeping his secret, by walking away, he will probably kidnap and rape/not rape another girl. She knows and shes willing to live with that to escape with her sister. Of course in the sequel, the blind dude will probably fly to Cali and track her down, build a trap house and YAWWWWWWNNNN, make millions.

Don't Breathe was directed by Fede Alvarez (Evil Dead), and stars Jane Levy (Evil Dead), Dylan Minette (Goosebumps), Daniel Zovatto (It Follows), and Stephen Lang (Tombstone). Sadly I can only muster a limp 4 out of ten stars for Don't Breathe

In the Dark Podcast with Leah Wiseman

Leah Wiseman in Family Possessions

So the cat's out of the bag. I have decided to start a new podcast, In the Dark. Actually I have been planning and dreaming of this for quiet awhile but now it has come to fruition. Our first episode of In The Dark will go live in just a few days, featuring our very first guest, actress Leah Wiseman,

If you aren't familiar with Leah Wiseman, you can watch her on the film Dollface from director Tommy Faircloth and Horse Creek Productions. You can also see Leah in the horror film Dismembering Christmas and especially in the upcoming Supernatural slasher film Family Possessions, also from Horse Creek Productions.

In our conversation with Leah, we will talk about her roles in both Dollface, and Family Possessions, what it's like to work with director Tommy Faircloth. We will also talk a little about horror conventions and whatever else comes to mind.

Along with our conversation with Leah, In The Dark will also introduce our favoite punching bag, and all around royal ego case, Sound Guy Willie. Sound Guy Willie will supposedly be running the soundboard and helping with audio quality. However who knows what Willie will actually be doing in that dark corner... Do we really want to know?

This is the first episode of In The Dark, but it wont be the last. The first show is in the can, much like Sound Guy Willie's writing career, and just waiting to uploaded. The actual Podcast will be available on Dead Sexy Radio at Deadsexyradio.com. We will link to it from this site as well, and hope you will take the time to check it out.

Upcoming guests will include celebrities, and non celebs who have an interestsign story. We hope to have a show that is both interesting and entertaining. With your support we can grow, we can get bigger guests, and bring back guests for more fun. But first off, lets get ready to give a big welcome to Leah Wiseman In The Dark, courtesy of Dead Sexy Radio and Lord Dixie's Dark Domain.

Eli Roth's Clown

No Bozo, all blood on Clown

If it seems it has taken forever for Eli Roth's Clown to make it to the big screen, well it hasn't but it has been a few years, The film, about a man possessed by a demonic clown suit, was actually filmed way back in 2012. You know back when we all thought Donald Trump running for President was just a joke. Those were simpler, more innocent times. But now, Clown, bearing a 2014 release date is finally, actually available in the U.S. on VoD, almost four years after filming.

There has been buzz about Clown for the last several years, no doubt helped by the attachment of Roth's name as producer. But the film is good enough to stand  on it's own, and honestly is better than most of Roth's work in my opinion. Clown was directed by  Jon Watts, who resists the urge to add comedy to a dark film (pay attention Eli), and make no mistake Clown is a dark film.

Clowns have always inhabited that weird place in out lives and culture. On the surface, happy, funny beings meant to make us laugh.  Yet the truth is, Clowns are also scary as shit. Kids know this, adults know this and film makers know this fact. There's just something about that painted on smile that never seems sincere. Watts takes that deep seated fear and externalizes it in Clown.

In Clown,  Kent (Andy Powers) a loving, and hard working father is running late for his son's birthday party. Adding stress to the hectic day, he's just informed the clown he booked can't make it. Luckily he comes across a decrepit old clown suit in the closet of the house he's remodeling. In order to not disappoint his son he fatefully puts on the suit. Unbeknownst to him it's not actually a clown suit but the skin of an ancient demon. A demon that has a taste for children.

Peter Stormare finds left overs from the clown

Any time you throw kids into a horror mix, it can go to dark places. Normally filmmakers shy away from harming kids in films. It may be alluded to, but it's never really seen.  Clown doesn't shy away. You do see actual child deaths, so sensitive people should beware. The more graphic kills are kept off screen but you see the bloody consequences, and you know fully what's going on,

Don't look so sad Pennywise, we're still terrified of you

If the death and cannibalism of kids wasn't enough, the film is even darker by the fact no one involved really deserved their fate.  Kent is honestly a decent guy. We don't see him ignoring his kid, cheating on his wife, or any major hubris. He seems to genuinely love his family and wants to take care of them, His only minor flaw I could possibly point at was, did he steal the clown suit? But it was in a house, the owner was dead, and it was being remolded for sale. It would have definitely been tossed in the trash bin if he hadn't decided to wear it. No, Kent was just an innocent, a nice guy who stumbled onto an evil presence and was taken over by it. That, to me, makes Clown much scarier.

The film hints and feints at going to even darker places before pulling back to a safer ending. The final fate of the clown was perhaps the weakest part of the story. It was definitely the lighter of several possible endings, basically re-enforcing what Kent was told at the beginning, there's no real escape, On a last note the effects team did a great job on the clown make up. They manage to create a creature that looks nothing like a human being. We watch as Kent goes from a goofy looking clown to something ancient and sinister.

A rare light moment from The Clown

Clown also stars Laura Allen (From Within) as Kent's wife and Peter Stormare (Dylan Dog:Dead of Night) as Karlsson, a man who has a connection to the suit, and might know a way out, Director Jon Watts is next slated to direct the Marvel and Sony collaboration Spiderman: Homecoming. If Clown is any indication spidey fans should be in for a damn good time.

Will the Walking Dead Survive Post Negan

So, I'm not the biggest fan of the Walking Dead, but I can't deny it's impact on pop culture. I also can't deny or ignore that tonight's episode has fans on the edge of their seat, and it's still hours away from airing as I write this. This is the night, that they introduce the biggest, baddie of the series, Negan.

Everyone is expecting a major character, most likely Glenn or Daryl to bite the bat tonight. Or possible their will be a cliff hanger and not croak till October. I think this is very likely, and also a shitty way for the filmmakers to treat their loyal fans. Thousands may riot if Daryl dies, at least that's what they scream, in all caps, on social media.

Why I still watch the Walking Dead

But beyond who will die, there is another question. Will the Walking Dead, the show itself survive Negan? In the comics life goes on. People live, people die and new threats arise. But the war with Negan lingers on in the comics for a while.  It does end though, and the survivors settle down in Alexandria for several years.

This presents quite a change in dynamics for the show. The survivors have never stayed in one place long. The prison latest the longest but there was constant threat from the Governor looming, not to mention walkers, prisoners, and the flu. Now, following the comics, the survivors, minus possibly several loved characters, are stuck in one spot for years. Exploring the exciting world of...trading between cities.

Will fans stay behind a show that is basically a post apocalyptic Mayberry RFD? Well hopefully not that slow, but the show has been mostly about a group on the run. Nowhere is safe. After Negan they find safety, if it continues to follow the comics.

Seriously, this is why I watch the Walking Dead

There are options for the Walking Dead. They could time skip, which I think the comics do, till the next threat. It gives them time to let Judith grow, and bring in new characters. It gives them time to greive and move on. But it also brings them closer to keeping up with the comics and possibly running ahead of it. A lot of the television walking dead fans still don't read the comics so that shouldn't hurt too bad. But a major change in theme, coupled with the loss of one or more beloved characters, could, maybe cause a major down swing in ratings.  Even if the Dixon Vixens don't riot.

Alexandra Daddario Farewell to the Horror Hottie

Being more involved in serious writing I have let the Dark Domain stagnate. Tho some, maybe most would argue it was never that fresh. However like a good little soldier it marches on, still getting random hits with no updates. Sure it's not hitting high on google search anymore, except a few obscure items and the Willie poking.

But it's a shame to let it die, cold and alone, and so I have been tempted back. Even though I have other blogs, none of them have the link juice and heritage of the Dark Domain, and not sure I have the patience and time to wait on them to get there. Time marches on and death comes for all, ya know?

So in my spare time from working a 40 hour shift, and writing for House of Tortured Souls, I will be doing some more work here at Lord Dixie's Dark Domain, while also, hopefully building up my other properties.

Hopefully I can refocus this blog on more serious promotion, and maybe drive some affiliate sales.. My goal, my dream, my lofty pretentious desires would be to focus on actresses. Mostly upcoming but I wouldn't say no to ScarJo, knowhattamean? I would do a short bio, along with some photos. sexxxy please. Something that would hopefully help promote them and their project, while also drawing people here.

But wait, and hark and shit.  Isn't that kind of what you do with Horror Hotties. Yeah kinda sorta, but not really. As I said this will be more serious than cheap T and A, with actual info, yet short of a full interview, and will full cooperation of the females involved. Yes, cooperation or at least permission.

Plus that name, Horror Hotties, I never really liked it beyond the alliteration. It's childish and cheap, and maybe I'm not the same dude I was when I thought it up. Or maybe I'm just no longer pretending to be that dude. The world changes a man, I've seen some things. and some stuff.

Right now I have no clue what I am going to call it. Not at all.  Maybe some simple like Actress Profile. But no, not that damn dull.  Any way, my lazy ass is going to send Horror Hotties out with a slight hurrah. One or two more posts, while I work on formalizing, and getting some willing test subjects.

So with that in mind here/s a big wolf whistle to out Farewell to Horror Hotties with the beautiful Alexandra Daddario. Whooooo. Alexandra Daddario that/s who. Now shes done a lot besides horror, in fact she doesn't have a lot of horror roles but damn she stood out the Texas Chainsaw 3D remake. If fact the lovely Ms Daddario and Dan Yeagers performance as Leatherface were the only two things that did stand out (See I completely skipped making a boobie pun. Growth man).

Seriously those eyes

Besides Chainsaw she has wowed audiences in San Andres, blown their heads completely off in HBOs True Detectives, and soon will be donning the trademark red swimsuit for the Baywatch movie. The sky is the limit for Alexandra with her piercing blue eyes and a chest that could stop a perpetual motion engine in it's tracks.  Stunning is a mother fucking understatement.  Seriously you could drown in those eyes and never gasp for air.

Again, those eyes

So enough gibble gabble to fuel the Google search requirements, let's feast on the beast that is the lovely Alexandra Daddario

Alexandra Daddario momma said knock you out

Bare ass in heels

Alexandra's gorgeous ass

Hawt and wet

Alexandra in Baywatch

It's about to get busty, err busy

Eric Morse aka William Pattison aka...

Eric Morse aka William Pattison aka Who?

Copyright Eric Morse aka Just the tip

Eric Morse aka William Pattison is one of those pseudo celebrities who exist on the fringe of the entertainment industry. For some reason the horror community seems to attract most of these “wannabe” celebrities like Morse. Eric Morse aka William Pattison's only claim to fame, besides being a loud mouth asshole/Facebook warrior is that he wrote a series of Friday the 13^th Junior adult novels. Not to take away from Morse's accomplishment, writing and getting a book published is no small feat and he deserves some praise for doing it successfully. Never mind that those books are really only known to a handful of hardcore Friday fans, and those unlucky enough to have heard Morse's insane gibbering about them.

So Eric Morse aka wrote a couple books in the late 80s, big deal. Take your fifteen minutes, and whatever royalties you get and move the fuck on. Set up a website and sell your books and autographs to anyone who might be interested. You might even find a few new fans. Unfortunately that's not good enough for Mr. aka. He thinks he is owed something by the horror community. He has written in his blog that he is owed fame, fortune and convention appearances. Exactly where he gets this theory of entitlement escapes me. He has said that the publishers promised him convention appearances. Well if it isn’t in the contract they don’t owe you shit.

So let's start with convention appearances. Eric Morse claims he has been blackballed from convention appearances. He definitely has given promoters reason to ban him with his online antics. If I was a promoter I would not touch him. He has attacked celebrities, referring to female celebrities ans bitches and whores. He has called homosexuals faggots, then excused it as “just the way we talk in California.” That excuse didn’t fly with Paula Deen so why should it excuse you? But the main thing he seems not to understand, is that fans are the ones who decide who gets invited to conventions. If the fans really want you, promoters will book you. Well they would have till you started raging online and stalking female celebrities (alleged by multiple female celebs). You were dropped from one convention because several woman complained they didn't feel safe with you there. Your only defense? I'm not a stalker because you say you aren't. If someone says they don’t feel safe around you, then screaming and calling them bitches wont convince anyone they are wrong.

Posted by one of Morse's fans, who had actually suggested him to a convention before he found out how nuts he was

Though Eric seems to hate all women to some degree, other than one or two who have almost as bad a reputation (or worse) than him, his main target for the last year or more has been the Soska sisters. Every blog post over the last year has been either directly or indirectly aimed at the Soska sisters. This infatuation with them is proof enough to any sane person that he is obsessive and borderline unstable. What did the sisters do to earn his eternal wrath? They didn't call him on his birthday. Now Eric Morse aka heartbroken, says they disrespected him. How did they disrespect him? They didn't call him on his birthday. He has of course offered them an olive branch. All they have to do is apologize and he will stop calling them bitches.

He claims that he supported the Soska's, helped make them. Sorry Eric Morse aka delusional the Soskas made themselves with help from their fans. American Mary was a brilliant film, does it have weak spots? Yeah a few, but it's such an awesome movie it makes up for it's flaws. You keep screaming about how horrible it is, but you cant give any details. Now you are attacking their new movie See No Evil 2, writing bad reviews when you haven’t even seen the movie. That makes you worse than a hack, it makes you a fraud. I have told you Eric, if you review a movie simply based on your hatred, or friendship, with a film maker, it makes your review worthless. Forget that your review on See No Evil 2 was only one paragraph. One paragraph of you screaming “this is crap.” Call yourself an author, but you are no movie reviewer.

His latest tactic is accusing other people, like Mike White of attacking the Soskas. Sorry Willie, err Eric aka Willie, I listened to the podcast and you are full of shit. Now if he reads this he will accuse me, once again, of being in the Soska cult. Which is weird since I have only seen one of their movies. I am such a bad cultist, I haven't even seen their first movie. See honestly Eric Morse aka dipshit, I am more of a Katie Isabelle fan, and if you hadn't attacked her, I probably would have left you alone and just kept laughing at your insane blog posts. But calling Katie and Danielle Harris ugly, well I can only assume you have never looked in the mirror. Really you are just another Internet warrior Eric Morse aka Cowardly Lion, brave enough to insult other people but ready to cry bully and troll when someone looks at your pasty ass. Pasty ass is off course alleged based on comments by Harlan Ellison.

Yes besides the Soskas you attack anyone who works with them from Danielle Harris to Vince McMahon. Vince is an idiot (according to you) and Danielle has turned her back on horror. Apparently because Danielle doesn’t want to work on movies for free anymore. More power to her, not everyone is confined to bit parts in Derek Young movies. Oh yes, Eric Morse aka Mr. Knowitall, the fact See No Evil 2 wont get a theatrical release has nothing to do with it's quality. It's a fact of movie making in the current times. Eli Roth's the Green Inferno probably wont get a theatrical release. It's a money thing that has nothing to do with quality, the fact you cant understand this is another high lite of your ignorance.

So besides the Soska's number one cheerleader, who is Eric Morse aka William Pattison aka Gerald Fitzgerald? Well let's look at what he has done, besides hate on the Soska's and others mentioned above.

He has attacked the women in horror month. He has attacked verbally several women in the horror genre. He has attacked Kane Hodder, He claimed to know who snitched on Lianne Spiderbaby (he was wrong). He was alleged to have made a fake profile of an actress in order to claim she was his girlfriend. I won't name her unless Willie aka Eric Morse aka who cares, denies it here, but I know who it was. He claims another actress “smooched” on him at a convention, then lied to him and lead him into believing they were dating. Really Eric, smooched? Are you still back in high school? It would explain a lot.

Eric Morse uses fake profiles to pretend people support him. He claims he is good friends with Johnny Depp. He claims he wrote Star Trek 3. He claimed to be personal friends with Harlan Ellison, until Ellison found out. What did Harlan say to you Eric? I don't know you and if we ever met, you weren't memorable enough for him to remember. The you blamed Harlan's old age on his lack of memory, and what did he say to you. He told you to stop mentioning his name. He, in Harlan's words, pulled down your pants and spanked your pimply pasty ass. How did that feel? To be publicly humiliated by someone you called your mentor? I could tell it hurt, you actually shut the fuck up for about a week. The of course you blamed the “internet bullies.” You lied about Harlan for years and it was their fault for telling him what you said. Oh I bet you raged and ripped the heads off a few stuffed animals that night didn’t you?

Eric Morse aka Harlan Ellison's best pal

And of course you hate the “horror socials” named after the “socials” in high school who didn’t accept you. High school is cruel, it's really cruel on us fat kids who love horror (like me). So I can imagine you had it rough too. Difference between you and me, I make friends at conventions. I bond with other outcasts instead of attacking them. Some of my best friends I have met at conventions and you attacking them, calling them drunks and addicts, saying they are members of cliques deeply offends me. It's not our fault you have few friends, and the list is shrinking every day.

Fact is Eric Morse aka William Pattison could be a welcome member of the horror community. It doesn't take an apology, it doesn’t take starting something bigger than someone else has. Like your attempts at Artist in horror month, or your Army. All it takes is stopping with the bullshit. Realizing that you cant do something with the expectation they will do something for you. Do it because it's what you want to do. If you do it good, you will get a payback. You claim you supported the Soska's now they owe you. Wrong. You support someone you believe in. If you have them on your show to help them, then that is your reward, giving your listeners interesting content. Don’t expect once they get bigger than you that they will pull you up with them. If you attack them when they don't pay you back on their schedule, why would they ever give a shit about you?

Eric Morse aka the Lion

Your artist in horror month, which was a joke, your “army”, your charity has all been about you. Not because you cared about any of those things. Appreciating an artist isn’t sending them an email, it's supporting them. Something you clearly don’t understand. There is nothing wrong with doing stuff for yourself. What is wrong is pretending you are doing it for a greater good, then attacking people who don’t support you. If the Soska's truly disrespected you then by all means, font support them. However spending a year calling them bitches only makes you look petty. You spend more time attacking others than promoting yourself.

All of this will of course mean nothing. You will call me a troll, you will call me a “Morse basher,” a bully, whatever. The horror community sees you for what you are. A petty, jealous, has been writer who can't move on. A bitter man, who hates on women because they don't do your bidding. A cowardly lion who roars online while deleting comments and posts that disagree with you. Well feel free to post her and attack me. I promise I wont delete any comments, even by your fake profiles. Even by your sister, who I don't think exists, I think you just put on a blond wig and call yourself Norma. By the way I have screen shots of your rants, of Harlan calling you out, of your claiming you are buddies with Harlan and Johnny Depp, and much more if you want to deny any of it.

Notice unlike your blog, I used nice paragraph breaks to make it easier to read? As an author you should appreciate that

The Horror of Porn

Sasha Grey has my heart in her hands in Smash Cut

So I recently wrote two reviews of horror films starring porn actresses, Smash Cut with Sasha Grey and Bloodlust Zombies with Alexis Texas.  Porn stars seem to gravitate to horror movies when they move into the mainstream, and it seems to be happening more and more frequently.  However it’s not a exclusively new situation, as adult actresses have been venturing into horror since the 70s at least.  Still it seems to be happening with more frequency so I thought a list of those porn actresses (and actors) who have made a leap, although sometimes temporary leap, into horror was in order.

Marilyn Chambers

The late adult actress Marilyn Chambers was one of the first porn stars to appear in a horror film in 1977’s Rabid.  Rabid was directed by the master of body horror Davis Cronenberg.  Chambers plays a woman who is seriously injured in a motorcycle accident and undergoes a radical new treatment to save her life.  After the treatment she grows an orifice under her armpit that hides a bloodsucking stinger.  Those she bites become rabid zombies that further spread the infection.

Cannibal Holocaust

Robert Kerman

The next porn star foray into horror was in 1980 in Cannibal Holocaust.  Cannibal Holocaust is one of the most notorious and controversial films of all time. Most horror fans know the story, the torture and killing of animals onscreen and the face that Italian director Ruggero Deodato was arrested for allegedly murdering his actors on film.  What not a lot of fans know is that Robert Kerman, one of the film’s stars had also appeared in over 100 adult films, including Debbie Does Dallas.  Cannibal Holocaust has become a cult classic, and one of the few horror films to feature a known male porn star.

The most successful porn actor to make the jump is easily Traci Lords.  While more a sci fi than horror film her role in 1988’s remake of Not of This World launched her mainstream career, which included several horror and sci fi appearances.  These included TV appearances in Tales from the Crypt and Stephen King’s The Tommyknockers.  While Traci has found success in mainstream film, she will be always be remembered for the fact that she was underage during most of her porn career, and only one of her adult films is legal to own in the United States.

Traci Lords in a bikini

Jeff Stryker

In 1989 Italian horror is again the vehicle for an American porn star, and once again it is a male actor.  Porn star Jeff Stryker starred in the Italian zombie film After Death, alternatively titled Zombie 4, or Zombie Flesh eaters.  Whatever it’s called, it’s pretty much a stinker, but it did well financially, perhaps much of that due to Stryker’s casting.

Also in 1989 was the release of Things with a small role for porn star Amber Lynn.  Honestly I haven’t seen things, but it’s on my list.  It’s regarded as a “so bad it’s good movie” and supposedly revolves around a woman given birth to a brood of ant like creatures.

Things the movie

Veronica Hart in Bloodsucking Pharohs in Pittsburg

In 1991 porn star Veronica Hart starred in Bloodsucking Pharaohs in Pittsburgh, which has to be one of the greatest movie titles in horror history.  It’s another I haven’t personally seen yet, but it has to be a “so bad it’s good” film, after all a credited director is the great Alan Smithee, nom de plume of every director too embarrassed to out his name on his work.  With that title you really don’t need too much of a synopsis, it’s pretty self-explanatory and, the title alone, and possibly Veronica Hart should convince you whether you want to see the film or not.

Evil Breed poster with Jenna Jameson

Chasey Lain from Evil Breed

Now we fast forward just over ten years to 2003 and Evil Breed: The Legend of Samhain.   The cover art and top billing for this gory horror film features Jenna Jameson, one of the hottest porn stars in recent years.  Unfortunately that doesn’t mean she has much onscreen time.  She does get naked, very naked in the unrated version, and her death scene does have one of the funnier moments of the film.  Still I had hopes that Jenna would be a major player in the film and bring her sizzle into horror films full force.  For the porn fan this film probably has the greatest collection of porn starlets outside of the AVNs.  In the movie alongside Jenna Jameson are Ginger Lynn Allen, Chasey Lain, and Taylor Hayes.  Evil Breed also stars Richard Greico, whose acting would make a porn star groan (and not in a good way.)  There’s little good about this film beyond the boobs, and you can see those on the internet for free, even the film’s director has denounced it.  It’s worse crime is promising much more of Jenna than it delivers.

Ginger Lynn Allen

2005 was a good year, especially if you like the porn horror combo, and aren’t horribly concerned about the quality of the film, or looks of the porn stars. Not only did Ginger Lynn return for a small part in The Devil’s Rejects, looking beautiful I might add, but another male porn star debuted in horror.  This time it is none other than the Hedgehog himself, Ron Jeremy playing the title character in Andre the Butcher. Ron plays an insane killer back from the dead to recruit nubile over sexed teens into Satan’s army by killing them.  It’s actually a fairly fun movie, played mostly straight but with a bit if silliness and jokes at Ron’s expense.  Andre the Butcher was the first American horror film to feature a male adult film actor.  Ron Jeremy would return to horror in 2008 with the film One Eyed Monster, in which is penis is possessed by an evil alien force.  Seriously

Jenna Jameson and Robert Englund in Zombie Strippers

In 2008 we get what we were promised in 2003 with Evil Breed, a horror movie featuring Jenna Jameson as a major character in Zombie Strippers.  Jenna stars alongside horror icon Robert Englund as the most popular dancer at a strip club infested with the living dead.  It’s more comedy than horror, but the zombie element does qualify it for this category.  Zombie Strippers pretty much delivers on all of it’s promises, nudity, gore and more nudity.  There isn’t a lot of acting but really a movie like this doesn’t require acting, just a willingness to get naked and covered in gore. Englund hams it up because he knows he has it good.  Hey who wouldn’t want to be in this movie other than the nut jobs at the Westboro “church?”

Glamorous Sasha Grey

The next year director Lee Demarble brought us Smash Cut with porn phenom Sasha Grey and cult icon David Hess.  The movie is bad, in a gloriously good way, although a lot of people won’t get that it’s bad on purpose.  The film is homage to cult films especially those of H.G. Lewis.  Sadly it was Davis Hess’s last finished project and the horror community will miss him dearly, a lot of critics have hammered Sasha’s acting, but horrible acting is what was called for.  If you don’t believe me check out some of those wonderful HGL movies like Blood Feast, or the film this closely resembles Gore, Gore, Girls.  If you don’t think she can act better than she did in Smash Cut, just check out one of her pornos, or Entourage. Pervs be warned Sasha doesn’t get naked in Smash Cut.

Piranha 3-D poster

In 2010 Alexander Aja remade the cult classic Piranha, with Piranha 3-D.  The movie was a big budget summer fun fest and full of naked and semi naked women.  While the major roles didn’t feature any porn stars, the movie would not have been the same without one.  Adult actress Riley Steele had a small, but very memorable role as one of the spring break “Girls Gone Wild” knock offs.  Her underwater naked make out with British actress Kelly Brook got the audience just as wet as the Piranha.

Sexy Riley Steele of Piranha

Alexis Texas from Bloodlust Zombies

The latest, at least at the time of my writing, is 2011’s Bloodlust Zombies with Alexis Texas. The biggest problem I had with Bloodlust Zombies was it couldn’t make up its mind whether it was going to be a serious film or a comedy.  My favorite part was Alexis Texas’s tits. We do get to see them a couple times.  There were some truly funny moments in Bloodlust Zombies and the film would have been better to play to these.  The serious moments, even when well-acted just didn’t work

So that’s it, probably not a wholly compete list but I think we covered most of the horror films with major contributions from adult entertainers.  There are many more I am sure with bit pieces, and porn stars used as dancers, extras etc, but all of the above at least had credited speaking roles.  Until next time, spank you very much for reading.

One Eyed Monster with Ron Jeremy

RIP Jonathan Frid and William Finley

On April 14, two men passed away with little fanfare and little notice from the mainstream media. One was William Finley, star of the cult classic Phantom of the Paradise as well as numerous other roles. The other was Jonathan Frid, star of the classic horror series Dark Shadows

Finley was lesser known than Frid, even in the horror community, even though he starred alongside celebrities like Chick Norris and Jessica Harper, and in films directed by Brian DePalma and Tobe Hooper. Still it was Finley who so many fans remember as Winslow Leech, the Phantom. His unique look lead to many small quirky roles, but nothing compared to the Phantom.

Frid was the man of so many childhood nightmares. His Barnabas Collins was a household name, at least in the horror community. Even many people, who don’t consider themselves horror fans, know the face if not the name, and many, like my late mother, freely interchanged the word Barnabas with vampire.

The media could almost be excused for not reporting heavily on Finley’s death. He was the star of a cult film, who remained masked for most of the film. Not only was his face hidden, but his signing voice was dubbed by Paul Williams for most of the film. Still he was a part of the horror community, our community, and his fans will miss him.

The lack of news on Jonathon Frid is nothing short of perplexing. While many inside the horror community might not know the name Winslow Leech, who is it that doesn’t know Barnabas Collins? The original series was remade in the 80’s with Ben Cross playing Barnabas, and now a remake starring Johnny Depp and directed by Tim Burton is in the works. With a trailer just released, and the movie being talked about, both good and bad, by horror fans, how in the hell was Jonathon Frid’s death not headline news this weekend?

***********(It appears that the Frid family may have only released the information today, which makes sense, still the fact remains that "lesser" celebrites are routinely overlooked by the press and often die with little notice)******************************

Shame on all the “news” sources that ignored these people’s death, they were important to us in the horror community. You have ignored so many others deaths, like Vampira, Ingrid Pitt, and Tura Santana. Maybe they weren’t guaranteed to snatch high ratings like a story about Snooki’s pregnancy, or Beiber’s latest haircut, but dammit they deserved more than they got. They deserve the same respect as others who have done less with their lives and are still celebrities. It pisses me off to see them ignored. It pisses me off to find out, along with so many others five days after the fact, that they have passed away.

RIP William Finley and Jonathon Frid, the mainstream news may have forgotten you, but your fans never will. You will live on in our memories forever

William Finley as Winslow Leech

Jonathon Frid, the original and only Barnabas Collins

Altitude to be rated R see the trailer

In a win for those tired of PG crappy horror, Altitude has received a "R" rating. Still could be a crappy movie but it looks good and smells of Lovecratft.  Just take a look at the poster and the trailer.  It is hinted at in the trailer that it could all be the effects of altitude causing hallucinations, but I'm hoping they don't go that way.  Start with the jokes, Squids in Space or Chthulu on a Plane.  Thanks to Rebecca Herzberger for origianlly posting the video on her Facebook or I might not have heard about it

The Divide teaser trailer

A friend brought this to my attention. Thanks Brian. It's by the director of Frontiers so it has the potential of being extremely brutal. It looks to be an end of the world, apocalypitic thriller but looks can be deceiving and I am expecting some type of twist. The movie is currently in production so no clue when we mighgt see it. It is on my radar now and I will try and drop an update when I find one. For now enjoy the teaser trailer

George Romero to remake Deep Red

According to variety magazine, George Romero is in “advanced negotiation to direct a 3-D remake of Dario Argento’s Deep Red. The screen play is being written by Dario’s brother Claudio, who also is co producer. Dario reportedly has no involvement with the script.




The two directors have a long relationship with each other and honestly if the film has to be remade, then I’d guess George is the man to do it. However I despise remakes in general and Argento’s work will be extremely hard to do properly in my opinion.



Argento’s film are a product of that era, a era that is no longer her or in vogue with the movie going audience. I simply cannot see an English language version of Deep Red playing in America if it is faithful to the original. I can see George trying to make a good film I just don’t think the studio will let him. If it is faithful, I don’t see American audiences rushing to see it. I could be wrong and hope I am for Romero’s sake.





Original article here

Season of the Witch

Nicolas Cage stars as a 14th century Crusader who returns with his comrade (Ron Perlman) to a homeland devastated by the Black Plague. A beleaguered church, deeming sorcery the culprit of the plague, commands the two knights to transport an accused witch (Claire Foy) to a remote abbey, where monks will perform a ritual in hopes of ending the pestilence.

A priest (Stephen Campbell Moore), a grieving knight (Ulrich Thomsen), an itinerant swindler (Stephen Graham) and a headstrong youth who can only dream of becoming a knight (Robert Sheehan) join a mission troubled by mythically hostile wilderness and fierce contention over the fate of the girl.

When the embattled party arrives at the abbey, a horrific discovery jeopardizes the knight's pledge to ensure the girl fair treatment, and pits them against an inexplicably powerful and destructive force.


The big question? Can Nicholas redeem himself after a host of stinker movies?